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Funny Stories

The Mailman's Last Day


It was the mailman's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the mail through all kinds of weather to the same neighborhood.

When he arrived at the first house on his route he was greeted by the whole family there, who congratulated him and sent him on his way with a big gift envelope.

At the second house they presented him with a box of fine cigars.

The folks at the third house handed him a selection of terrific fishing lures.

This went on all day long as he was well-known and well-liked throughout his beat.

He was nearly at the last house when he was met at the door by a strikingly beautiful woman in a revealing negligee. She took him by the hand, gently led him through the door (which she closed behind him), and led him up the stairs to the bedroom where she blew his mind with the most passionate lovemaking he had ever experienced.

The next morning, he went downstairs, where she fixed him a giant breakfast: eggs, potatoes, ham, sausage, blueberry waffles, and fresh-squeezed orange juice. When he was truly satisfied she poured him a cup of steaming coffee. As she was pouring, he noticed a dollar bill sticking out from under the cup's bottom edge.

"All this was just too wonderful for words," he said, "but what's the dollar bill for?"

"Well," she said, "a couple of days ago, I told my husband that yesterday would be your last day, and that we should do something special for you. I asked him what to give you."

"He said, "Screw him, give him a dollar."

The lady then said, "The breakfast was my idea."

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